Look, Ma! It’s January! As our year begins anew, we embrace the month of diets, taxes, holiday regrets, winter blues and the pre Valentine’s Day onslaught. It’s the perfect season for…the vampire.
I’m sure your first thought after that double take must be something along the lines of “What are you smoking?’ The answer is nothing. It’s too expensive and very bad for your health.
So please sit back as I explain. Thanks to a certain series of books, the vampire has become more romanticized than ever before. Many people just adore the lustful, free spirited, sexy, usually wealthy, and angsty undead beings known as “the children of the night”.
I’m thoroughly amused by the fact that the Twilight book series has been out since 2005 and people are still whining about sparkles. Get over yourselves! I’m not crazy about the new fad myself. But it’s not worth going gray over. We’re merely seeing a new angle on an old idea. Take a look back through history and you’ll see how the vampire has had enough accessory changes to make Barbie jealous.
During the python-like constrictive Victorian era, authority figures hated everything. Thus there was no way that a magazine could openly write about sex. Naturally, this simply invoked writers’ creativity in finding loopholes. So they transformed the agonizing experience of being ravaged by a vampire into a sensuous experience. What better metaphor could there be for making out than some creature nibbling on a person’s neck?
Credit for many of the modern vampire’s traits goes to James Malcolm Rymer’s 1845 creation “Varney the Vampire”. The vampire’s standard self-loathing nature, amazing strength and hypnotic powers were among Varney’s “privileges” of being a blood sucker. Oddly enough, Varney had no problem with sunlight. (No, he didn’t sparkle.) He could function as a perfectly normal human being without aversion to religious items or garlic and some minor disagreement with food.
It was only through the works of other authors, like Joseph Sheridan La Fanu and Bram Stoker, that the vampire became cut off from “normal society”. While many of the vampire’s afflictions with religion, reflections and refreshments have come and gone, only sunlight has survived as the vampire’s main obstacle.
During the war-torn 1940s, the vampire filled a needed void by becoming a comedian for the populace to laugh at. By figuratively tearing out the vampire’s fangs, people felt that they could face anything. Even after the misguided efforts of 1950s paranoia tried to lay these creatures to rest, the vampire’s comedic role in series like the Munsters has helped it thrive and followed it right into today.
Dracula, and friends, took on a new role during the 1960s – hero. Not only was Drac fearfully funny, he was a creature to be admired and praised for the good that he does. In both a brief Dell comic book as well as an animated series, descendants of Dracula decided to fight for justice. That’s right; vampires weren’t just good guys helping the weak and needy. They were super heroic guys, saving the day and the damsels too.
Let’s not forget the 1980s when children stepped into the spotlight in all mediums. Even the vampire went to school. Oddly enough, the teenage vampire wasn’t usually angsty. The teenage vampire was cool. It was the popular kid that everyone wanted to be around. You’ve heard of the Fonz? The vampire was the Fangz.
From high school hunk to teacher and babysitter, the vampire’s been there. Befriending the “outcast” children of the world has become all part of the vampire’s persona. Apparently after meeting author Anne Rice, vampires got some feeling back in their….er emotional stability.
Cartoons like “Mina and the Count” and “Dear Dracula” give us Count Babysitter befriending the unpopular kids and showing them how to thrive in society. (Ironic, isn’t it?) We have the Count of Sesame Street teaching our youth the wonders of numbers. Count Chocula reminds our tots of the importance of breakfast.
For those who loved the scandal, Barnabas Collins kept the Dark Shadows series entertaining for 4 years. Let’s not forget the brat prince, Lestat. His free wheeling mischief has delighted audiences since 1976.
In the Shadow Hearts Covenant video game series, the vampire returns to its “almost normal human” roots. Only their ability to transform into bats and their, practically immortal, life spans separates them from average human. Joachim Valentine takes great pride in his wrestling prowess and seeks to become a world wrestling champion. He’s strong as an ox and has no problem with sunlight. He just happens to be a homosexual vampire. That’s all.
Next up we have Angel. Now here’s your little angst-pot. Beginning as a series villain on the 1996-2003 “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” series, Angelus received a soul and a spin-off series of his own. Now Captain Angst-a-Lot –er, Angel - feels bad for all of the harm that he’s caused. So he seeks to help everyone with their paranormal dilemmas. You know, protect people from supernatural baddies, finding a means of peaceful communications between the various demonic entities and defending himself from everything that wants to kick his tail for some reason. Angel does all of this while struggling to avoid being purely happy for even one instant because that’s his curse. Be a sad sack or lose your soul. Doesn’t that sound fun? Apparently it was good for 5 seasons.
So from beast to babe to babysitter and even baby, the vampire has experienced quite a colorful life over the years. Being a girl’s sparkly teen heartthrob bobble is merely the latest aspect to the vampire’s life. Who wouldn’t want a little sparkle on Valentine’s Day?
Now of course, throughout the entirety of the vampire’s life, it has still struck fear into the hearts of the masses. Every so often, someone manages to revitalize that fear by reaching back into the depths of history and recapturing the truly evil predatory beast that the vampire used to be.
What will the vampire be next? Perhaps they’ll get into politics or the legal system. How’d you like a real blood-sucking lawyer on your side? Maybe Dracula will be president someday.
- Footnotes:
- The Internet Movie Database www.imdb.com
- Anne Rice’s website http://annerice.com/
- Varney the Vampire’s Wiki page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varney_the_Vampire
- Shadow Hearts Covenant website http://www.shadowheartscovenant.com/
- Barnabas Collin’s Wiki page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barnabas_Collins
- Shadow Hearts Covenant Walkthrough http://lparchive.org/Shadow-Hearts-Covenant/
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